[+] Secretary

"I'm your secretary!"

this movie is the tits. one reason it's so cool is you go through life and meet people and talk about movies. and so many people who you'd never expect have seen this movie.

it's about this lawyer who hires a new secretary or whatever to type up documents for him. she makes some typographic errors and he repremands her. by spanking her sharply on the bottom.

it's an interesting toe in the water of BDSM real-world relationships as well as committment, power exchange, etc.

[-] Ask The Dust

bandini's having a tough time making it as a writer. he's a complete asshole to camilla who he meets and later claims to love. he lives in a hotel on the first floor so he can come and go from the window so as to avoid the landlord at the front desk.

the best moments are when the old guy (Donald Sutherland) in the next room comes over and visits bandini. he is pretty deranged but keeps antonio from starving.

[+] Mirrormask

the most visually amazing film you will ever see.

[+] The Cell

If you are interested in watching a thriller, and if you are interested in watching something that will grab your attention, and if you are interested in watching something that is very visually appealing, then watch The Cell.
Jennifer Lopez and Vince Vaughn are both in this movie, but the acting that really makes the movie is the performance by Vincent D'Onofrio who plays a derranged psychopath whose mind Catherine Dean, played by Jennifer Lopez, enters.
The costumes in the movie were designed by Eiko Ishioka, and April Napier. Ishioka has designed costumes for Cirque su Soleil, and some of the costumes from this movie were every bit as detailed and intense as those from Cirque du Soleil.
The plot of the movie is really interesting and you will not loose interest while watching it, but I really want to show you some of the incredible cinemography and costume design and everything from the movie, so here are some screen shots. Yay screen shots!!!

[+] MirrorMask

MirrorMask is a super awesome movie. Very very very visually appealing. You can very much tell that alot of time and effort and the majority of the budget went into the artwork for this film, not that the other aspects of the movie are lacking, but the art work is so very impressive. There is this one particular rather famous scene, and I do not know if you have seen it before, but I had before watching the movie, where the main character gets dressed by these dolls or puppets that almost meld into real people and the clothes that she is getting put on her are almost putting themselves on. The visual aspect of this movie is so very incredible, the movie is put out by Jim Henson.
The artist who put together most of the artwork for the movie is Niel Gaiman, whose name you might recognise as the writer of Sandman. Here is some of his work (outside of MirrorMask)

This picture is called "Dark Snow White Snow, Glass, Apples"


This is from Sandman

On top of the effort that was put into the artwork on the movie, the plot is thoroughly interesting and captivating, and the performances by Jason Barry, Gina McKee, and Stephanie Leonidas are stunning. Please watch this movie, but possible not on a Mac.
Some screenshots from the movie:

[+]Kinky Boots

Kinky Boots is a really good movie about a multi-generational shoe factory. It was released in 2005 in Great Brittan, and I believe became a box office hit. The story is set in approximately modern day Great Brittan. The story starts with Charlie Price, played by Joel Edgerton whose name you may recognise from his performance as Owen Lars in the new Star Wars episodes, although he looks nothing like Owen Lars in the movie, he plays a very mild mannered man in approximate mid thirties.
Sarah-Jane Potts also stars in this movie as Lauren, and employee at the Price Shoe Factory, she is a very beautiful woman, but her looks are underplayed in this movie to make her a more believable factory worker. Chiwetel Ejiofor plays Lola, an integral character in the movie and he was perfectly cast, his character is the most interesting, and he acts very well, both in somber situations and comidic ones, and as an outgoing entusiastic person, and as a shy one, who like everyone has their own insecurities.
There are a lot of very cute lines in this movie, and it is a very enjoyable watch. I actually only had one problem with this movie, and that is that they overly attempt to show a metaphor that ought to be obvious to the viewer. That is it, just one complaint, overall very good movie and I would really really like a nice comfortable pair of Kinky Boots.

[-]Goth

Whatever you do DO watch Goth just for the trashiness. If you read the IMDB summary for the movie Goth you may be intregued, the summary sounds really good, but then you watch the movie and realize what trash it is. For you to really understand how horrible this movie is, picture the most preppy person you know and imagine them making a movie about goths. A couple of "goths" Crissy and her boyfriend decide to go to a concert at a goth club, at this concert they meet a woman called Goth who leads them on a series of adventures, the dialogue is so painful and forced, and the gothicness is so cheasy that you will be laughing at the writers.

[+] Basquiat

Basquiat is a movie about this painter who is super tight with Andy Warhol, played by David Bowie, the cast alone is worth watching the movie for, some names that you will recognize are Jeffrey Wright, who plays Basquiat, Benicio del Toro, Claire Forlani Christopher Walken, Willem Dafoe, and Courtney Love, just to list a few. It is set in New York City in 1979. Basquiat is a painter who is living in parks in cardboard boxes, and he goes from being very poor and selling artist trading cards, to being very very sucessful. He is introduced and forms a very tight friendship with Andy Warhol, as a side note, David Bowie is absolutely great in the role, mannerisms and body movement are absolutely perfect. So this movie traces Basquiat's growth to fame, and in doing so, shows many many of his painting, which are so detailed and so interestingly made and shown being made in the movie. It is a dramadocumentary-kind of, and it is pretty fast paced, I mean I do not have a very long attention span, but I was intregued and interested for EVERY moment of this movie, as both a caracter and a real person Andy Warhol and his crowd are and were a very interesting movement in art in this last few generations. I highly reccomend this movie to anyone, and would encourage you to watch this as soon as possible.

[+] Shopgirl

Claire Danes, Steve Martin, and Jason Schwartzman star in this drama about looking beyond first impressions to find the right person.

Rather obviously based on a novella written by Steve Martin, Shopgirl tells the tale of Mirabelle Buttersfield (Danes), a naïve college graduate from Vermont who seeks her fortune in L.A. Unfortunately, the glove department at Sak’s Fifth Avenue doesn’t look too promising. Quite suddenly, two very different men begin to vie for her attention. The first, a grungy young guy named Jeremy (Schwartzman) whom she meets at a Laundromat, is unfathomably wild and random, and what at first seems to be adorably awkward quickly turns into Woman’s Worst Nightmare: he takes her out, doesn’t pay, is completely spacey, and still asks for a kiss at the end of the night. Still, Mirabelle is longing for any company at this point, at least until the second man, Ray Porter (Martin), arrives on the scene. Ray has class and money, for all he is thirty years older than Mirabelle, and he lavishes her with attention and gifts. So of course she would choose him! Except that Ray doesn’t really want to settle down with her. He thinks she’s a pretty young girl deserving of his attentions, but not in any serious way. He attempts to make it clear to her, but she doesn’t get it. Jeremy, meanwhile, spends some time traveling, and returns, adorably awkward as ever, but with a new sense of what girls might want (Or not. Maybe I’m just hoping here.) Mirabelle has to choose in the end, and though she’s been hurt, she has a newfound sense of who she is and what she wants.

I never thought of Steve Martin as anything but a comic actor (little did I know, he has a Master’s Degree in Philosophy) before seeing this film. I haven’t read his novella, but I think seeing the film is sufficient. It is like the visual representation of a novella, replete with an annoying-at-times voiceover narration that was mostly unnecessary and whose information might have been carried more effortlessly through things as simple as well-chosen props and complex facial expressions. It was visually pleasing; the simple but strong nature of the sets and lighting were reminiscent of Brokeback Mountain: solid, contrasting colors and very little clutter, with the lighting harsh or soft to convey the appropriate mood. It was rather like a novel brought to life.

Claire Danes’ performance is alternately enigmatic and driven: Mirabelle Buttersfield is clearly every woman in her twenties, and yet has her own personality. Steve Martin, in the only truly serious role I’ve ever seen him in, seems at first a bit of an odd choice (perhaps because he is the author?) and yet he fits, somehow (on a side note, the man is aging quite well). Jason Schwartzman is oddly attractive, although it may be Jeremy’s zany geminian charm shining through.

Most importantly, there’s a point to the film, and the point is driven home clearly. In most movies today that are based on books, the point seems to be lost through all the visual hoo-hahs. Perhaps the moral of the story was a bit too literary for the medium, and this may be why I have a feeling that the book would be better.

All told, a 7 out of 10. It’s pleasant and gets you thinking about what might be really important in relationships after all.

[+] The Omen 666

let me ask you this. did you see the original Omen? if you did, then you saw the new one. when i saw the original, i didn't know the name of the movie or something for some reason. but then i saw the new one and 2 scenes i remembered instantly giving that warm "oh yeah..." feeling.

first, the priest goes to warn the father that the kid is evil. and then he says "i'll see you, in hell." and then it begins to storm and he wants to either A, be saved in the church or B, take sanctuary. so he runs to the church. and when he gets to the doorstep, (god) zaps these spikes on top of the gothic church (think stained glass and gargoyles) and it plummets down through the priest's chest and into the ground. i think in the original it might be one of those wrought iron fence spikes or something. comment if you know. oh and throughout the movie there's a photographer for the tabloids who takes pictures of this crazy priests ever since he came in contact with the main character, a politics guy. so when he develops the pictures (and digital), there's this stange dash of light pointing toward the priest. at first i thought it was like a halo for him being the messenger and protecting the world from Damien but it turns out to symbolize god smiting the shit out of him or something. on a side note, the photographer is a mac user who has a macbook pro and a 30 inch apple display in his dingy factory apartment/darkroom.

so the other main scene i remembered is when the mother (Julie Stiles) is up on a chair on the balcony in the mansion house they all live in. and she's watering some hanging plants. so in the original i think the kid comes by on a trike or big wheel, like in The Shining. here, he's on a razor scooter and he knocks into the procariously tiptoed mother on top of the chair. obviosly, she falls over the railing and falls like 2 or 3 floors to the marble inlain floor.

just so you know, i would pee in Julie Stiles' butt in a heart beat. especially in O. since i sort of grew up with her she seems too young to be a mother in this movie, especially one giving birth. especially to her son growing up to be five. plus her husband is the young successful politics ambassador. wasn't she in Save The Last Dance? if so, she was definitely hot there too.

it's all for you, Damien.

[+] Stay

this movie was actually pretty good. it got your mind working. here's the premise. new york city. psychologist/psychiatrist (i don't know the difference or care to learn it; a shrink) takes over a case for a friend/fellow shrink. it's a college student at some amazing art school in nyc. he decides he's going to kill himself on this 21st birthday at midnight. he's an artist and obsessed with this other famous artist who destroyed all his artwork and killed himself on the brooklyn bridge as the best work of art ever. so ok fine he wants to try to help this kid. his wife is also an artist who we later find out attempted to kill herself also before they were married or whatever. anyways they are stable and loving and well off in the city. so he wants to help the kid who, we find out has some precognition and hears voices and has some other inexplicable skills. he reminds me of the kid in Thumbsucker a bit because he's a bit dark and emo but also realizes the shrink can help him so he opens up ever so much. i'm not going to give away much of the rest of the ending because some of the other stuff that happens is amazing. if i hadn't just read the book (gasp, read a book?!) Fight Club, i would have liked this movie a lot more, the way it ends. that should make it obvious enough for you to want to see it.

[-] Undead

well i was hopeful that his would be a genuinely scary zombie movie. but it turned out to be more like Shaun of the Dead. this is where the zombies take like a million bullets and dont die. and then they look at the gaping hole where their stomach used to be and have that funny/confused look on their face. the main character in this movie is a hillbilly from a small town. he apparently love weapons because he has memorabilia from like the world's fair of weapons. when he's shooting the zombies he always at least 2 guns in his hands. usually he is shooting 2 pistols. and then they run out. and then he pulls more and more guns out of unseen pockets in his overalls. the main weapon he has is three sawn off shot guns welded together. although this is a cool idea, its never made clear whether all three guns fire simultaneously though i think that's what you're supposed to think. they should have shown three shotgun shells fall to the floor to let you know. oh. so i havent really told you about the movie. well guess how people get turned into zombies. aliens. right. so these aliens come and zap zombieism into people with these grapefruit sized meteors. then farmer guy saves the heroine by killing a zombie. then they retreat to his bachelor farm house. then these comic relief police officers come and try to take over the situation. and stony faced farmer wont let them. so they go into the basement. and zombies come. and they go int oa sub-basement (root cellar) and zombies come. and they finally go into this fallout shelter thing he has. ooh and before the police people came to join them, this pregnant woman and her young husband come. so there's six of them in the bunker. and suddenly the woman decides she needs to squeeze out this baby. so they gather like 4 duffel bags worth of guns and supplies from this guys gun lockers. they get in the farmer's rusty van and try to go to a hospital knowing its prolly taken over by zombies. then they are driving on this country road and there's this sky high spiked wall in the way going on in all directions as far as the eye can see. so they cant pass. so one police officer, the more annoying/leader tries to climb it. and the other way the zombies are fucking with people is this acid rain. so as hes climbing the farmer recalls to his other passengers what happened to him earlier. he was fishing and he got this fish. and it turned into an amazing zombie fish. and bit him. and he kept shooting it. and it kept flying all over the place. soon it was just a pile of scales and blood from being shot so much. and so apparently it rained on him. now this is where i sort of lost track fo the movie and started watching porn on my parents' couch. either the acid rain heals you from zombie wounds OR it makes you more of a zombie. i'm sorry, i don't know. what i do know is when they went out into the rain they had to rinse off with bottled water to get rid of the acid rain. but also i think the cut he got from the attack bass got healed somehow. so then i lost track of the movie for a while while i surfed lifeofvice.com. in the end, the aliens came down and zapped some people with these beams of light from the sky and all the people from this town were suspened in the atmosphere above this acid rain cloud cover they put there. then i don't know what happened but eventually i think the aliens experiment was over and they left with their ships. and supposedly the infestation was under control and everyone was healed and quarantined in the hospital. and THEN one last guy is in the hospital and he still has zombieism and he bites the still-living farmer guy. and then the pandemic supposedly starts up again. but after all this rigamaroll the heroine has been toughened so she has this 4-gun welded-together shot gun and she is like the only survivor for the quarantined town or something. and the last scene is she has all the townspeople (zombies) caged up in this huge fence in the field outside the farm house. and she sits down with quadgun in the rocking chair on the porch saying she has to keep them in check.

so when you see it on the shelves, don't bother with Undead.